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AUTHOR TO BE LET.

BEING

A PROPOSAL humbly addreffed to the Confideration of the Knights, Efquires, Gentlemen, and other worshipful and weighty Members of the solid and ancient

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GENTLEMEN,

AM glad to find you meddle with the dirty Work of your Brother Journalists. To be inoffenfive is a puritannical Spirit, and will never fucceed in a free-thinking Age. What is Gold itself (fays the Philofopher) but Dirt? It is dug out of dirty Mines; and, as a Proof it retains its Nature, we come at it eafieft through dirty Means. Be affured, a Scavenger of Wit is a more gainful Occupation than that of a delicate, moral Writer.

By this I mean to let you fee my Ability, and to proffer my Service. You must know when my Mo

Richard Savage was the Author of this Pamphlet, which was publifhed about the Year 1730. It is much commended by Dr. Samuel Johnson in his Life of that Gentleman.

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ther was pregnant of me, the once dream'd she was delivered of a Monster. It was observed also, at the Time of my Birth, that a Weezle was heard to fhriek; and a Bat (though at Noon-Day) flew into the Room, and fettled upon the Midwife's Wrift, juft as fhe received me. While in the Cradle I was very froward. Early at School I discovered a promifing Genius for Mischief. I carried Tales from one Boy to another to set them a fighting, and afterwards to the Mafter, to have them whipped. I had always Cunning enough, when I committed a Fault, to lay the Blame upon another, and laugh'd to fee him fuffer for it. (A fure Prognoftick of my future Judgment in Politicks!) I was fond of tearing away the Legs and Wings of Flies, of picking out the Eyes of fome little Bird, or laming fome favourite Lap-Dog, meerly by way of Amusement. This was only a Sign, that one Time or other I fhould have Ill-nature enough for a great Wit. Now I understand to be a great Wit, is to take a Pleasure in giving every body Pain, and to fhew no Mercy to a Reputation, which is dearer to fome Fools than perhaps a Limb, or an Eye. I was alfo given to pilfer whatever lay in my Way; a Proof only that I would never fcruple being a Plagiary, should I turn Author. I was expert at almoft every thing except learning my Book; but neither Encouragement nor Correction could bring me to any Senfe of Duty. I was always very fullen after being corrected; and if my Mafter forgave, and admonished me in a friendly Manner, I all the while ridiculed the old Put (as I then called him) by making Mouths or Horns over his Shoulder. This fhewed I had always Wit enough to laugh at the common Notion of Gratitude. "I hooted at any unfortunate, ill-drefs'd Person in the Street, if he looked like a Gentleman, and never failed to mock the Infirmities of old Age. When at a Sermon, I was very full of Play myself, and fond

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of interrupting the Devotion of others; fo that (I thank my Stars!) in my Youth I had a fashionable Contempt for Religion. I came young into the World, with little Education, lefs Money, and no vifible Way of living: However I qualified myself (though of mean Birth) for a Gentleman of Wit and Humour about Town. I have naturally a Sourness of Temper, a droll Solemnity of Countenance, and a dry Manner of joking upon fuch Accidents, as Fools who value themfelves upon Humanity, would be apt to compaffionate. I have also a Propenfity to fneer upon all Mankind, and particularly upon those who fancy they can oblige me. Thefe elegant Qualities recommended me early to the Friendship of Dick Morley, Author of Mother Wifeborn. We met frequently at a little fnug Gaming House, never yet difcovered by informing Conftables. A Similitude of Circumftances and Sympathy of Souls endeared us to each other; and to him I owe the Improvements of my afore-mentioned Faculties. These he cultivated, and many others implanted in me of the like Nature.

We commenced Authors together. At my first fetting out I was hired by a reverend Prebend to libel Dean Swift for Infidelity. Soon after I was employed by Curll to write a merry Tale, the Wit of which was its Obscenity. This we agreed to palm upon the World for a pofthumous Piece of Mr. Prior. However, a certain Lady, celebrated for certain Liberties, had a Curiofity to fee the real Author. Curll, on my Promise that if I had a Prefent, he fhould go Snacks, fent me to her. I was admitted while her Ladyfhip was fhifting; and on my Admittance, Mrs. Abigail was ordered to withdraw. What paffed between us, a Point of Gallantry obliges me to conceal; but after fome extraordinary Civilities, I was difmiffed with a Purse of Guineas, and a Command to write a Sequel to my

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Tale. Upon this I turned out fmart in Drefs, bit Curll of his Share, and run out most of the Money in printing my Works at my own Coft. But fome Years after (juft at the Time of his starving poor Pattifon) the Varlet was revenged. He arrefted me for feveral Months Board, brought me back to my Garret, and made me drudge on in my old dirty Work. 'Twas in his Service that I wrote Obfcenity and Profaneness, under the Names of Pope and Swift. Sometimes I was Mr Jofeph Gay, and at others Theory Burnett or Addifon. I abridg'd Hiftories and Travels, tranflated from the French what they never wrote, and was expert at finding out new Titles for old Books. When a notorious Thief was hanged, I was the Plutarch to preferve his Memory; and when a great Man died, mine were his Remains, and mine the Account of his laft Will and Teftament. Had Mr. Oldmixon and Mr. Curll agreed, my Affiftance had probably been invited into Father Bobour's Logick, and the critical Hiftory of England.

But before all this happened, a young Nobleman gratified me for letting fome Verfes of mine be handed about at Court in Manufcript under his Name. This was the first Time that I ever heard my Writings generally commended. But alas! how fhort-lived the Applaufe? They unfortunately stole into print, loft their Reputation at once, and I am now ashamed to write any more, as a Perfon of Quality. I am a great Joker, and deal in Clenches, Puns, Quibbles, Gibes, Conudrums, and Carry-which-its. Many a good Time have I lashed the whole Body of Clergy, and crack'd many a fmart Joke upon the Trinity. One of my Books had the Honour of being prefented for a Libel by the Grand-Jury, and another was made a Burnt-Offering by the Hands of the Common Hangman. If an Author writes a Piece that has

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Succefs in his own Character, I abuse him; but if in a fictitious one, I endeavour to perfonate him, and write a fecond Part to his Work. I am very deeply read in all Pieces of Scandal, Obfcenity, and Profaneness, particularly in the Writings of Mrs. Haywood, Henley, Welfted, Morley, Foxton, Cooke, · De Foe, Norton, Woolfton, Dennis, Ned Ward, Concanen, Journalist-Pit, and the Author of the Rival Mades. From these I propofe to compile a very grand Work, which fhall not be inferior to Utopia, Carimania, Gulliverania, Art of Flogging, Daily Journal, Epigrams on the Dunciad, or Oratory Tranfactions; and, as this is defigned for the Ufe of young Templers, it is hoped they will promote my Subfcription. Since private Vices have been proved to be publick Benefits, I would venture to call it, An Ufeful Body of IMMORALITY, and print it in a broad, pompous Folio; but fuch a one as may very well be bound up with Dean Smedley's intended Body of Divinity.

By the Help of Indexes, and technical Dictionaries, I work on every Branch of Learning. I pore often over the Volumes of State Tracts, whence I collect Paragraghs, which I mix with Remarks of my own, and range under feveral Heads, Those against a difcarded Minifter I fend to the London Journal, or Concanen's Daily, or Weekly Papers. *Concanen is a precious Fellow! I once loved him for his Ingratitude to Dean Swift: I now adore him for his dull Humour, and malevolent blundering Billingsgate against my Lord Bolingbroke. Other Paragraphs more virulent against a Prime Minifter (for I naturally hate my Superiors) are for my very good Friend the Craftfman. How long have I

In thy felonious Heart, tho' Malice lies, It does but touch thy Irish Pen, and dies.

DRYDEN.

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