then light. But I am called away, and must conclude by saying I would hope your remaining years will be peculiarly devoted to the interests of Christian perfection; promoting it by every possible means; and may the Lord succeed your every attempt, prays, Rev. sir, Your obliged, humble servant in Jesus, D. MAXWELL. CHAPTER XXIV.-1789. Lady Maxwell's multifarious engagements-Diary continued-Again visits Bristol-Meets with many perplexities respecting Hope Chapel. LADY MAXWELL's engagements during this year were so numerous and important, that she had but little leisure left for friendly correspondence. The care of many of the churches now devolved upon her; and the constant attention which these demanded, nearly absorbed the whole of her time. To one of her friends she thus apologizes for long silence :-" I have often wished, and intended to write you, but have been prevented. Though the pen is necessarily and almost constantly in my hand, even to the injury of my health, I can seldom enjoy the privilege of writing to a Christian friend. My peculiar situation deprives me of many privileges. How, then, can I sufficiently adore the goodness, and admire the power, that, while thus situated, keep my soul alive to divine things.' But though she was thus obliged to remit all avoidable correspondence, she continued her diary nearly with as much frequency and fulness as ever. To this, therefore, we shall, for this year, again have recourse, And surely it must be encouraging to every faithful and laborious servant of Jesus to observe, in the experience of this eminent saint, such a remarkable accomplishment of that precious promise :-" My grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect in weakness." January 25. Still I have cause to sing of mercy. My God is still gracious in secret and public, opens my mouth in his cause, and makes my pen move swiftly upon the delightful theme. He enables me to devise liberal things for my fellow creatures, and draws out my soul to the stranger, the ignorant, and the poor; and enables me to go on my way rejoicing. The trials which he permits, he supports me under, and delivers me from; frequently disappointing my fears. But I feel ashamed I do not make greater progress; that my love is so cold; that I come so continually short. Yet my God bears with me in the most tender manner. O the height and depth of redeeming love! Still the Bible is a source of uncommon comfort and profit to me, and still I have sweet times of refreshing in secret prayer. کر February 7. Innumerable opportunities are now given me for promoting the temporal and spiritual good of my fellow creatures. I am not permitted to reason, and thereby weaken my own hands, by considering how inadequate the instrument to the arduous task of producing permanent good. Duty is mine; events are the Lord's. Still I walk in the light of a luminous faith for sanctification: though in a much lower degree than many highly favoured ones; but I am sweetly invited daily to come up higher. 23. Had a sweet, though short visit from on high this day; a precious touch of the love of Jesus. Hearing from the pulpit yesterday of the too common evil of the Christian falling from his first love, I was led to examine my own experience on this point; and, after a review of the years which have elapsed since I first knew the pardoning love of God, I find, if my heart does not deceive me, reason to conclude I have not lost my first love; yet have much cause to lament that I have not made greater progress in the Christian faith; and, also, to admire the long-suffering patience of a gracious God and his tender dealings with me. O for a heart and life to praise him as I would and ought. April 11. I feel ashamed that, though time passes quickly away, I do little to purpose in the course of it. I feel at times deeply humbled on this account, even when the Lord is gracious. O my God, strengthen my hands herein; make me as active, and as zealous, and as useful, as humanity and my particular situation will admit. I would fain crowd as much work as possible into my little span of life. Lord, let not the ghost of murdered or wasted time haunt me on a deathbed. 15. Much with others; might have been more spiritual in my conversation. Had many temporal things to mention; but, though the end was good, I erred in the time spent in them. In general, I find it best to carry all my matters to a throne of grace, and to obtain direction from the Source of wisdom: yet, I must confess the Lord often teaches me through the medium of the creature. I cannot, therefore, condemn the measure, but only wish to have the line drawn for me by Him with whom is the residue of the Spirit. I felt humbled for my mistakes, and shortcomings; yet the Lord was good, and showed me the more excellent way. O that henceforward I may walk in it, and always find rest to my soul. May 20. O what cause to praise redeeming mercy. My communion with God the Father and Son has been, in a very peculiar manner, inexpressibly delightful. I have been strengthened by it, both in body and mind; and carried through much trying and perplexed business with ease. When the enemy would have poured in, his temptation found no place in me: in the same moment I found myself lifted up, God himself was at my right hand, and poured his love into my soul. How unworthy of all this love. ` I would lie low before my God. I feel his will very precious, and his word a source of much profit, strength, and comfort to my mind. June 7. Since last date I have been struggling through various trials. The daily exertion of divine power keeps me standing. All my victories are obtained through that strength, and leave me conscious of my own weakness, and under great obligations to redeeming love with much desire to ascribe all the glory where alone it is due. This morning, in my way to the house of God, I had some delightful views of, and sweet meditations upon, the great privilege of having God as my Father; and went with an intention of renewing my engagements to be the Lord's at his own table. When there was unexpectedly taken ill, and much tempted. I asked for leave to stay till I had communed, which was granted. At the table the Lord was unspeakably gracious: I saw his fulness; I felt it; I sunk sweetly into him. Father and Son felt very sensibly nigh: it was a precious season. 28. Toiled all day, but caught little till the evening. I then got a view of the fulness of God, and felt sinking into it. I long for deeper impressions of divine things. I would be more solemn, every moment pierced with a sense of the divine preI would be filled with the full assurance of hope unto the end. I do most things too quickly speaking, thinking, praying, reading. The Lord, in tender compassion, shows me the most excellent way in all things, but I learn slowly, and have reason to admire his patience. O for a heart to praise him sence. more! July 3. This day, also, has proved a good time, though confined to bed. In the evening my cup overflowed, and I was constrained to tell those who desire to love the Lord, what he had done, and was doing for my soul. How unwearied his kindness. How numberless my obligations! I am confounded when I think of my unworthiness, of my shortcomings, and how little love I have to this gracious God after all he has done. But the more I meditate upon these humiliating circumstances the more he increases his kindness to me. Eternity alone can unfold the wondrous tale. It is more than mortal language can express, or human thought conceive. But O, eternity will in some measure capacitate for glorifying and enjoying this source of bliss! 10. Much business of various kinds has fallen to be * "I believe," says Mr. Wesley, "a few, but very few Christians have an assurance from God of everlasting salvation; and that is the thing which the apostle terms the plerophory, or full assurance of hope. "I believe more have such an assurance of being now in the favour of God as excludes all doubt and fear. And this, if I do not mistake, the apostle means by the plerophory, or full assurance of faith." done these days past. I am a wonder to myself. Unable to do any thing of myself to purpose, yet called to do much. I trust all is of God, who guides my pen, my tongue, my heart. As one proof of this, he keeps my mind above all, and with himself; entirely dependent upon himself. O, what oil to the wheels of the soul do I find divine love! Without this, I should indeed drive heavily on, if I did not stop altogether. I have had many opportunities for promoting the spiritual interests of others lately; and my soul has panted with generous desires to embrace them all, and many more. Real religion enlarges the heart in good will to all; here is no monopoly, no exclusive charter, wished for in this business. Have felt to-day rather suspicious that I am not, at present, in my place, respecting the management of part of the affairs committed to me, which lies at a great distance. Surely the Lord will direct a soul he has made so desirous to do his will in all things. 24. My God rejoiceth over me to do me good from day to day. In secret prayer, this morning, Jesus drew delightfully nigh. He is my soul's bright morning star; he carries me through every difficulty. Looking to him, mountains melt down to mole hills, and rough places are made smooth. "O Lamb of God, was ever pain, Was ever love like thine." The cloud now seems decidedly to point to the south; and my mind seems more reconciled to the various trials of a long journey. The will of my God is precious, whatever aspect it wears. I am his, and would go, or stay, or suffer what he appoints. 66 66 Being fully satisfied that the finger of Providence again pointed to Bristol, Lady Maxwell left Edinburgh on the 17th of August. She travelled by short stages; and at every place where she rested endeavoured, as usual, to promote the cause of religion. She arrived at Noble-house the first night, worn out by excessive fatigue before leaving home: but here a sphere of usefulness soon presented itself," and this animated and quickened her " 'languid powers." The next day she reached Moffat. "Many opportunities offered on the road, and were thankfully embraced;" but in this town the prospect of good was dark and discouraging." Passing through Penrith and Shap, she reached Burton on Saturday night, the 21st. The next day she wrote:-"Was confined to bed all the morning, but had a precious time. My mouth was opened to speak of and for the Lord; and I was favoured with many opportunities to act for him." She has not recorded the course of her journeying the following week; but, on Friday the 28th, we find her at Wolverhampton, where she made the following entry in her diary :"Since my last date at Burton, I have gone over much ground, and at every place endeavoured to bear my testimony, in a small degree, for Jesus. Except at particular times, my joy has not been so great. I have been kept in peace-my evidences wonderfully clear for sanctification-so as to surprise myself, and to stimulate me to do all I could for that God who does so much for me. When thus employed I am in my element, though Satan strongly opposes. This day, a piercing consciousness of my shortcomings and great unworthiness has humbled and broken me down before God. I perceive such a want of wisdom, judgment, and indeed every thing which might lead to self-applauseor to a trusting in any thing short of God himself, for direction in every thought, word, and action-as to make me stand astonished that he should bear with me. O what a bottomless abyss is redeeming love. For hours, while under this humbling exercise of mind, God the Father and Son drew sweetly nigh, and melted down my heart into a very tender frame, and drew out my soul in strong desires for more love, more heavenly wisdom, and great increase of divine life." On the second of September her ladyship arrived at Bristol, under a lively sense of the divine goodness. The next day she wrote: "Through much mercy, came here last night, brought through many fears, dangers, and trials. Words fail to say how gracious the Lord has been to me. How he strengthens my trust in him, my expectations from him, and my confidence in what he has wrought in me, with respect to sanctification! He comforts me much in reference to his work in this place; so that I do expect he will appear in my behalf, and carry me through every difficulty.' Lady Maxwell continued in Bristol until the 20th of October. She had much perplexing and harassing business, which kept her constantly employed; but was also favoured with much divine support. Many things tending to obstruct the work in which she was engaged were happily removed, and an increase of pecuniary aid was afforded. The following extract, written on her arrival at home, affords farther light on the objects of this journey: "Left Bristol Hot-Wells on the 20th of October. I have much cause to bless the Lord for his goodness to me while there, and for his remarkable interpositions in behalf of his work at the Wells particularly in inclining the heart of the heir-at-law to do all I asked, and in the way I proposed. Without this I could not have gone on. The Lord was with me of a truth; melted down mountains of difficulty, and brought wonderful things to pass. This was agreeable to the hopes he had given me before I left home. He is a faithful God: with truth I may set my seal to this. After travelling upward of four hundred miles with my own horses, through much bad road, and sometimes under heavy rains and high winds, he brought me in health and peace to my own habitation on the 7th of November. On the road home he gave |