AGC V SCENE I.-The Street before OLIVIA's House. Enter Clown, and FABIAN. Fab. Now, as thou lov'st me, let me see his letter. Clo. Good master Fabian, grant me another request. Fab. Any thing. Clo. Do not desire to see this letter. Fab. This is, to give a dog, and in recompense desire my dog again. Enter DUKE, VIOLA, and Attendants. Duke. Belong you to the lady Olivia, friends? Clo. Ay, sir; we are some of her trappings. Duke. I know thee well: how dost thou, my good fellow? Clo. Truly, sir, the better for my foes, and the worse for my friends. Duke. Just the contrary; the better for thy friends. Clo. Marry, sir, they praise me, and make an ass of me now, my foes tell me plainly I am an ass; so that by my foes, sir, I profit in the knowledge of myself, and by my friends I am abused; so that, conclusions to be as kisses, if your four negatives make your two affirmatives, why then, the worse for my friends, and the better for my foes. Duke. Why, this is excellent. Clo. By my troth, sir, no; though it please you to be one of my friends. Duke. Thou shalt not be the worse for me: there's gold. Clo. But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I would you could make it another. Duke. O! you give me ill counsel. Clo. Put your grace in your pocket, sir, for this once, and let your flesh and blood obey it. Duke. Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double dealer: there's another. Clo. Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play; and the old saying is, the third pays for all: the triplex, sir, is a good tripping measure; or the bells of St. Bennet, sir, may put you in mind-One, two, three. Duke. You can fool no more money out of me at this throw: if you will let your lady know, I am here to speak with her, and bring her along with you, it may awake my bounty further. Clo. Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty, till I come again. I go, sir; but I would not have you to think, that my desire of having is the sin of covetousness; but, as you say, sir, let your bounty take a nap, I will awake it anon. [Exit Clown. Enter ANTONIO, and Officers. Vio. Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me. Yet, when I saw it last, it was besmear'd, 1 Off. Orsino, this is that Antonio, Vio. He did me kindness, sir, drew on my side, But, in conclusion, put strange speech upon me; I know not what 'twas, but distraction. Duke. Notable pirate, thou salt-water thief, What foolish boldness brought thee to their mercies, Whom thou, in terms so bloody, and so dear, Hast made thine enemies? Ant. Orsino, noble sir, Be pleas'd that I shake off these names you give me : Antonio never yet was thief, or pirate, Though, I confess, on base and ground enough, Orsino's enemy. A witchcraft drew me hither: That most ingrateful boy there, by your side, From the rude sea's enrag'd and foamy mouth Did I redeem: a wreck past hope he was. His life I gave him, and did thereto add My love, without retention, or restraint, All his in dedication: for his sake, Did I expose myself, pure for his love, Into the danger of this adverse town; Drew to defend him, when he was beset: Where being apprehended, his false cunning (Not meaning to partake with me in danger) Taught him to face me out of his acquaintance, And grew a twenty-years-removed thing, While one would wink; denied me mine own purse, Which I had recommended to his use Not half an hour before. Vio. How can this be? Duke. When came he to this town? Ant. To-day, my lord; and for three months before, No interim, not a minute's vacancy, walks on earth! But for thee, fellow; fellow, thy words are madness: Three months this youth hath tended upon me; But more of that anon.-Take him aside. Oli. What would my lord, but that he may not have, Wherein Olivia may seem serviceable?- Duke. Gracious Olivia, Oli. What do you say, Cesario ?-Good my lord, Vio. My lord would speak, my duty hushes me. Oli. If it be aught to the old tune, my lord, It is as fat and fulsome to mine ear, Duke. Why should I not, had I the heart to do it, Like to the Egyptian thief at point of death, Kill what I love? a savage jealousy, That sometime savours nobly.-But hear me this: Since you to non-regardance cast my faith, And that I partly know the instrument That screws me from my true place in your favour, Live you the marble-breasted tyrant still; But this your minion, whom, I know, you love, And whom, by heaven I swear, I tender dearly, Him will I tear out of that cruel eye, Where he sits crowned in his master's spite.Come boy, with me: my thoughts are ripe in mischief: Vio. And I, most jocund, apt, and willingly, To do you rest a thousand deaths would die. [Following. Oli. Where goes Cesario? Vio. After him I love, More than I love these eyes, more than my life, More, by all mores, than e'er I shall love wife. If I do feign, you witnesses above Punish my life for tainting of my love! Oli. Ah me! detested? how am I beguil'd! Vio. Who does beguile you? who does do you wrong? Oli. Hast thou forgot thyself? Is it so long?Call forth the holy father? [Exit an Attendant. Come away. [TO VIOLA. Oli. Whither, my lord?-Cesario, husband, stay. Duke. Husband? Duke. Oli. Ay, husband: can he that deny? Duke. Her husband, sirrah? Vio. No, my lord, not I. Oli. Alas! it is the baseness of thy fear, That makes thee strangle thy propriety. Fear not, Cesario: take thy fortunes up; Be that thou know'st thou art, and then thou art As great as that thou fear'st.-O, welcome, father! Re-enter Attendant, with the Priest. Father, I charge thee, by thy reverence, Here to unfold (though lately we intended To keep in darkness, what occasion now Reveals before 'tis ripe) what thou dost know, Hath newly past between this youth and me. Priest. A contract of eternal bond of love, Confirm'd by mutual joinder of your hands, Attested by the holy close of lips, Strengthen'd by interchangement of your rings; And all the ceremony of this compact Seal'd in my function, by my testimony: Since when, my watch hath told me, toward my grave I have travelled but two hours. Duke. O, thou dissembling cub! what wilt thou be, Sir And. He has broke my head across, and has given sir Toby a bloody coxcomb too. For the love of God, your help! I had rather than forty pound I were at home. Oli. Who has done this, sir Andrew? Sir And. The count's gentleman, one Cesario. We took him for a coward, but he's the very devil incardinate. Duke. My gentleman, Cesario? Sir And. Od's lifelings! here he is.-You broke my head for nothing; and that that I did, I was set on to do't by sir Toby. Vio. Why do you speak to me? I never hurt you: You drew your sword upon me, without cause; But I bespake you fair, and hurt you not. Sir And. If a bloody coxcomb be a hurt, you have hurt me: I think you set nothing by a bloody (0xcomb. Enter Sir TOBY BELCH, drunk, led by the Clown. Here comes sir Toby halting, you shall hear more: but if he had not been in drink, he would have tickled you othergates than he did. Duke. How now, gentleman! how is't with you? Sir To. That's all one: he has hurt me, and there's the end on't.-Sot, did'st see Dick surgeon, sot? Clo. O! he's drunk, sir Toby, an hour agone: his eyes were set at eight i' the morning. Sir To. Then he's a rogue, and a passy-measures pavin. I hate a drunken rogue. Oli. Away with him! Who hath made this havoc with them? Sir And. I'll help you, sir Toby, because we'll be dressed together. Sir To. Will you help? An ass-head, and a coxcomb, and a knave! a thin-faced knave, a gull! Oli. Get him to bed, and let his hurt be look'd to. [Exeunt Clown, Sir TOBY, and Sir ANDREW. Enter SEBASTIAN. Seb. I am sorry, madam, I have hurt your kins man; But had it been the brother of my blood, I must have done no less with wit and safety. Duke. One face, one voice, one habit, and two persons; A natural perspective, that is, and is not! Ant. Sebastian are you? Seb. Do I stand there? I never had a brother; Seb. Vio. My father had a mole upon his brow. Vio. And died that day, when Viola from her birth Had number'd thirteen years. Seb. O! that record is lively in my soul. He finished, indeed, his mortal act Seb. So comes it, lady,-[To OLIVIA.]—you have been mistook; But nature to her bias drew in that. Boy,-[TO VIOLA.]-thou hast said to me a thousand times, Thou never should'st love woman like to me. Duke. Give me thy hand; And let me see thee in thy woman's weeds. Vio. The captain, that did bring me first on shore. Hath my maid's garments: he, upon some action. Is now in durance at Malvolio's suit, A gentleman, and follower of my lady's. Oli. He shall enlarge him.-Fetch Malvoli hither: And yet, alas, now I remember me, How does he, sirrah? Clo. Truly, madam, he holds Belzebub at the stave's end, as well as a man in his case may do. He has here writ a letter to you: I should have given it you to-day morning; but as a madman's epistles are no gospels, so it skills not much when they are delivered. Oli. Open it, and read it. Clo. Look then to be well edified, when the fool delivers the madman:-[Reads.]—“By the Lord. madam," Oli. How now! art thou mad? Clo. No, madam, I do but read madness: an your ladyship will have it as it ought to be, you must allow vox. Oli. Pr'ythee, read i' thy right wits. Clo. So I do, madonna; but to read his right wits is to read thus: therefore perpend, my princess, and give ear. Oli. Read it you, sirrah. [TO FABIAN Fab. [Reads.] "By the Lord, madam, you wrong me, and the world shall know it: though you have put me into darkness, and given your drunken cousin rule over me, yet have I the benefit of my senses as well as your ladyship. I have your own letter that induced me to the semblance I put on: with the which I doubt not but to do myself much right, or you much shame. Think of me as you please. I leave my duty a little unthought of, and speak out of my injury. "The madly-used MALVOLIO." Oli. Did he write this? My lord, so please you, these things further thought on, To think me as well a sister as a wife, Duke. Madam, I am most apt t' embrace your [TO VIOLA.] Your master quits you; and, for your service done him, So much against the mettle of your sex, You must not now deny it is your hand, Why you have given me such clear lights of favour, Oli. Alas! Malvolio, this is not my writing, Fab. Good madam, hear me speak; And let no quarrel, nor no brawl to come, Taint the condition of this present hour, Which I have wonder'd at. In hope it shall not, Most freely I confess, myself, and Toby, Set this device against Malvolio here, Upon some stubborn and uncourteous parts We had conceiv'd against him. Maria writ The letter at Sir Toby's great importance; In recompense whereof, he hath married her. How with a sportful malice it was follow'd, May rather pluck on laughter than revenge, If that the injuries be justly weigh'd, That have on both sides past. Oli. Alas, poor fool, how have they baffled thee! Clo. Why, "some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrown upon them." I was one, sir, in this interlude; one sir Topas, sir; but that's all one.-"By the Lord, fool, I am not mad;"-But do you remember? "Madam, why laugh you at such a barren rascal? an you smile not, he's gagg'd:" And thus the whirligig of time brings in his revenges. Mal. I'll be revenged on the whole pack of you. [Exit. Of our dear souls :-mean time, sweet sister, Orsino's mistress, and his fancy's queen. [Exeunt. CLOWN SINGS. When that I was and a little tiny boy, A foolish thing was but a toy, For the rain it raineth every day. But when I came to man's estate, But when I came, alas! to wive, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, |