and preached against them. I acknowledged, that I judged their way was not of God; and therefore, when it fell in my way, I did preach against it. And understanding that he meant of a note I had at Morbattle facrament, I defired him to tell me what he heard I had faid. He fhifted this; and I told it him, viz. that I exhorted thofe that had met with God at that occafion, to tell to them, that it was fo; and that they thereupon, according to the fpi-rit of the gospel, fhould fay, " We will go with you, for "we hear the Lord is with you *." J. L. faid, if that were true, that the Lord were with you, we would join with you. Mr St. having no will to make that the determining point, told me, that he knew not but the Lord was with the church of the Jews in time of great corruption. To which I anfwered, And neither did Chrift himself separate from them in that time; and urged them with that, Luke iv. 16. After other fhifts, they were at length brought to that defperate anfwer, That Chrift was the lawmaker, and therefore not imitable by us. The perfon whom I took for Mr Macmillan was not like to speak, and therefore I asked for Mr Macmillan. I ftaid there with them an hour and a half at least; but faw not Mr Macmillan. When I was coming away, I defired Mr St. to tell him, that feeing I had not feen him, he would come to my house and fee me; which he undertook to tell him. About fix weeks after this rencounter, and my not meeting Mr Macmillan having made a noise in the country, I heard that John Scot in Langfhawburn had faid of me, that I was a liar, and he would prove me a liar, for I had never afked for Mr Macmillan, nor defired him to come to my houfe. This was at first very troublesome to me. Afterwards I found real joy in my heart, in that I was made partaker of the fufferings of Chrift, while I faw a fpirit of bitterness poffeffing fome of that party. However, the truth was brought to light after, by the confeflion of fome of that party. Mr Macmillan was in that houfe in the time, in an outer chamber; and Adam Linton told me, that he was certainly informed, that he caufed the lafs lock the door, and give Mr Boston preached on this occafion from Pfal iv. 6. both on Monday and Saturday, in June 1707. The fermons are preferved; and there is an exhortation in the clofe of the laft, much the fame with what is here Delated. him in the key at the door head or foot, whatever was his defign in it. It pleafed the Lord, for my further trial, to remove by death, on the 8th September, my fon Ebenezer. Before that event, I was much helped of the Lord; I had never more confidence with God in any such case, than in that child's being the Lord's. I had indeed more than ordinarily, in giving him away to the Lord, to be faved by the blood of Jefus Chrift. But his death was exceeding afflicting to me, and matter of fharp exercife. To bury his name, was indeed harder than to bury his body; and fo much the heavier was it, that I could fall on no fcripture-example parallel to it; but I faw a neceffity of allowing a latitude to fovereignty. I could not charge myself with rafhnefs, in giving him that name. But one thing was plain as the fun to me, that that day eight days before, my heart was exceffively led away from God towards the creature; and I had not vifited my pillar fo often and feriously as I ought to have done. Nov. I have been much refreshed and encouraged under my difcouragements, understanding by fome, what others of the parish have told them, of my fermons ripping up their cafe, and difcovering the fecrets of their hearts, though, alas! with little vifible fruit. Nov. 12. I faw M. D. a diffenter, whom I could never fee before. I was in the next village, and fhe was coming thither; but feeing my horfe at the door, fhe went home again. I went to her house, and fhe came to the door, having, as appeared, no will that I fhould come in. I afked her what were her fcruples. She did not readily anfwer, but at length abruply faid,The oath fealed with his blood.' Queft. What mean you by that, the covenant, the folemn league and covenant? Anf. They fay there was such a thing. Q. And was the covenant fealed with Chrift's blood? A. Yes. I fhewed her her mistake. Q. How many covenants has God made with man? A. Three; the covenant of grace, and the covenant of works. Q. Which of the two covenants was first made? A. The covenant of grace. Q. Who were the parties in the covenant of works? A. The Lord. Q. But with whom did the Lord make it ? A. With the body and blood of Chrift. Q. How many gods are there? A. Three. Q. How many perfons are there in the Godhead? A. Three; the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Q. Which of these was was our Redeemer ? A. The Father. Q. What or who is Chrift? No anfwer. Q. What ftate are you in by nature? No anfwer. Q. How think you to be faved! A. By ferving God as well as we can. I dealt with her as with a petted bairn; but by no means could I obtain fo muh of her as to be willing to admit converse with her for her inftruction. In January 1708, the fire in the congregation was blown up into a violent flame, upon occafion of my obferving a fast, on the 14th of that month, appointed by the civil magiftrate. Upon this many of my hearers broke off, and left me; feveral of whom never returned. There was fuch a headiness among the people, and the day was fo bad, that few came to it. I had no fcruple as to the obferving of it; though thought it a grievance and disadvantage that we were come under by the union, and the taking away of the privy council, whereby there was no correfpondence betwixt the church and state as to fafts. But confidering the temper of the people, I thought, if I fhould have yielded to them in this, I would teach them to dictate ever after unto me. There came two of a fellowshipmeeting unto me the night before; fhewed them the proclamation. They profeffed they had nothing to say against it, but that it came from an ill airth. They were not difpofed to receive light, but most unreasonably, amongst reasons of their diffatisfaction, infifted, that (as they faid) the minifters were going to get the abjurationoath, I was led to that fcripture for my text, 1 Sam. iv. 13. "Eli's heart trembled for the ark of God:" which came fuitably to my circumstances; as I had been led another time, on a week-day in Auguft, to that, "Thou "haft been weary of me, O Ifrael," when the unexpected practice of the people undervaluing the opportunity, was a confirmation of the doctrine. The Lord's day was eight days thereafter, preaching on If. Ixiv. 7. the reproof for this practice natively fell in *. But the Lord's day immediately • The reproof here referred to is as follows. "If Chrift depart from us, then the blame lies at our own doors; for he may be holden ftill. The cafe of this land is very dangerous, yet it is not hopeless. Our Lord is yet within a cry, within the reach of prayers; and if he go for want of ferious invitation from us to ftay ftill, we are inexcufable. Alas, that there are fo few stirring up themselves to take hold of him! I muft needs fay, that the empty room in this church on the fast-day, is no good fign either for the land or for the parish. If fitting at mediately thereafter, it was fo ftormy, that I had only a few to preach to, in the houfe. Then I found myself like a bird fhaken out of its neft, and was as an owl in the defert. Instead of the converfe I, fometime a-day, had with exercised Chriftians about their own fpiritual cafe, I was engaged in difputes about the public, and about feparation, and how to defend the lawfulnefs and duty of hearing me preach the gofpel: and for the most part to no effect. So that many a time it was a terror to me to go out among them; and coming to particular places, I often looked very blunt, finding myfelf befet with contemners of me and my miniftry; who often kept not within the bounds of common civility. This humour of deferting my ministry, and breaking off from under it, continued from time to time, without any notable ftop, till the affair of Closeburn brought it about nine years after. Since that time there has been a remarkable fettling among them, in that point: howbeit, even fince that time I have had as much of that treatment as will not fuffer me to forget where I am. This deferting of my miniftry was the more heavy to me, that ordinarily I knew nothing about it from any hand, till after a while, that the parties were gone off, and confirmed in their way; and that few had any confideration of me, in hiring fuch into their fervice. This laft continues in fome measure to this day; though the occafion is not fo much now, as before: infomuch that among the first fervants my own elder fon had, and that by advice or approbation of an elder or elders, was one who would have gone out of the house if I had come into it to vifit the family. Meanwhile Satan raged in ftirring up to the fin of uncleannefs; fo that, by the fpring 1709, befides several fornications, there were two adulteries in the parish difcovered and I had heavy work with both. These things often made me look, with a forrowful heart, on the con : home, or going about your work that day, was a way to hold Chrift fill in the land, I am much mistaken. Sure the people of Judah did not fo defpife the faft proclaimed by King Jehoshaphat, 2 Chron. xx. 3. But if thefe people did, with Ffther, chap. iv. 16. keep private fafts at home, when others were gathered together for that work in the congregation, it will fay much to clear them of contempt of the ecclefiaftical and civil authority calling them to faft and pray that day, and fay, that they were indeed concerned to hold Chrift ftill amongst us. And fure there was never more need to faft than at this day," &c. gregation, as in the cafe of the church of Corinth, burnt up with the fire of divifion, and drenched in fleshly abominations. Feb. 15. My difcouragements increase daily among this people, by reafon of the divifive temper inflamed by the late faft, fo that there are feveral of them whofe faces I have not feen fince that time. My circumftances are extremely heavy: they feem to have little defire for the gofpel: the most weighty truths look as naufeous to them; though if any thing relating to the public fall in, they use to prick up their ears. Some have never come to the ordinances fince I came, being led by mere laziness and profane neglect; befides those that were always diffenters from the established church. Thofe that come, many of them think nothing of staying away several Sabbaths; and when they come, they are generally very uncomfortable. My wonted exercise of converfing with exercifed fouls is gone; there is no converfe but about the divifion; the practice of godliness is thereby ftifled, and burnt up with the fire. The crown is fallen from my head, and I am brought very low! The approaching Sabbath, that sometimes was my delight, is now a terror to me; fo that it is my business now, to get my forehead fteeled againft brafs and iron. On Sabbath was fourteen days, I felt the fad effects of giving way to difcouragement, and this has put me on my guard. I have fometimes afked myself, Whether, if I had known all that has befallen me here, I would have accepted the call, or not? and I cannot fay, I durst have refufed. Two things are fupporting to me: 1. My clearnefs as to my call from the Lord, which has not been perplexed by all that I have met with, but ftill remained. as a ground of comfort. 2. An amazing conduct of Providence in preaching the word, whereby I am guided in my ordinary to fpeak to their cafe. As, particularly, these two laft Sabbaths it fell in my ordinary to lecture the 7th and 8th chapters of the Revelation, where I had occafion to fpeak largely of fchifm and divifion, with the effects thereof. And in this very time Mr Macmillan was preaching in the bounds. And in my ordinary fermons I find the fame conduct of Providence. On the 22d of February this year 1708, the first of the aforementioned adulteries was delated: but the parties were not got convicted, till May 14. During which time, I was with fome elders four times on the fpot, at Buc cleugh |