If such a one will smile, and stroke his beard; But there is no such man; for, brother, men Ant. Therein do men from children nothing differ. Ant. Yet bend not all the harm upon yourself; Leon. There thou speak'st reason: nay, I will SO. My soul doth tell me Hero is belied, And that shall Claudio know; so shall the prince, Enter Don PEDRO and CLAUDIO. Ant. Here comes the prince, and Claudio hastily. Leon. Thine, Claudio; thine, I say. D. Pedro. You say not right, old man. My lord, my lord, I'll prove it on his body, if he dare; If thou kill'st me, boy, thou shalt kill a man. Ant. He shall kill two of us, and men indeed: Leon. Brother And what they weigh, even to the utmost scruple : Good day to both of you. We have some haste, Leonato. Leon. Some haste, my lord!-well, fare you well, my lord. Are you so hasty now?-well, all is one. D. Pedro. Nay, do not quarrel with us, good old Leon. But, brother Antony- Come, 't is no matter: My heart is sorry for your daughter's death; I will not hear you. Come, brother, away.-I will be heard.- [Exeunt LEONATO and ANTONIO. Enter BENEDICK. D. Pedro. See, see! here comes the man we went to seek. Claud. Now, signior, what news? D. Pedro. Welcome, signior: you are almost come Leon. Tush, tush, man! never fleer and jest at me: to part almost a fray. I speak not like a dotard, nor a fool; As, under privilege of age, to brag What I have done being young, or what would do, I say, thou hast belied mine innocent child: Claud. We had like to have had our two noses snapped off with two old men without teeth. D. Pedro. Leonato and his brother. What think'st thou? Had we fought, I doubt, we should have been too young for them. Bene. In a false quarrel there is no true valour. I came to seek you both. Claud. We have been up and down to seek thee; for we are high-proof melancholy, and would fain have Thy slander hath gone through and through her it beaten away. Wilt thou use thy wit? heart, And she lies buried with her ancestors, O! in a tomb where never scandal slept, Claud. My villainy? Bene. It is in my scabbard: shall I draw it? D. Pedro. Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side? Claud. Never any did so, though very many have been beside their wit.-I will bid thee draw, as we do the minstrels5; draw to pleasure us. 1 And sorrow, wag! in f. e. 2 Ben Jonson calls a book-worm, a candle-waster. This would make the text mean, pedantic speeches. pish often spelt as in the text. 4 Put me aside. 5 Draw their instruments from their cases D. Pedro. As I am an honest man, he looks pale.Art thou sick, or angry? Claud. What! courage, man! What though care killed a cat, thou hast mettle enough in thee to kill care. Bene. Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, an you charge it against me.-I pray you, choose another subject. Claud. Nay then, give him another staff: this last was broke cross. D. Pedro. By this light, he changes more and more. I think he be angry indeed. Claud. If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle.' Bene. You are a villain.-I jest not-I will make it good how you dare, with what you dare, and when you dare.-Do me right, or I will protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you. Claud. Well, I will meet you, so I may have good cheer. D. Pedro. What, a feast? a feast? 2 Claud. I' faith, I thank him; he hath bid me to a calf's-head and capers, the which if I do not carve most curiously, say my knife's naught.-Shall I not find a woodcock too ?3 ( Bene. Sir, your wit ambles well: it goes easily... D. Pedro. I'll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the other day. I said, thou hadst a fine wit: "True," said she, "a fine little one:" "No," said I, "a great wit:" "Right," says she, a great gross one:" "Nay," said I, "a good wit:" "Just," said she, "it hurts nobody:" "Nay," said I, "the gentleman is wise:" "Certain," said she, "a wise gentleman:" "Nay," said I, "he hath the tongues:" "That I believe," said she, for he swore a thing to me on Monday night, which he forswore on Tuesday morning: there's a double tongue; there 's two tongues." Thus did she, an hour together, trans-shape thy particular virtues; yet at last she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the properest man in Italy. Claud. For the which she wept heartily, and said she cared not. D. Pedro. Yea, that she did; but yet, for all that, an if she did not hate him deadly, she would love him dearly. The old man's daughter told us all. Claud. All, all; and moreover, who saw him when he was hid in the garden. D. Pedro. But when shall we set the savage bull's horns on the sensible Benedick's head? Claud. Yea, and text underneath, "Here dwells Benedick the married man!" Bene. Fare you well, boy: you know my mind. I will leave you now to your gossip-like humour: you break jests as braggarts do their blades, which, God be thanked, hurt not.-My lord, for your many courtesies I thank you: I must discontinue your company. Your brother, the bastard, is fled from Messina: you have, among you, killed a sweet and innocent lady. For my lord Lack-beard, there, he and I shall meet; and till then, peace be with him. [Exit BENEDICK. D. Pedro. He is in earnest. Claud. In most profound earnest; and, I'll warrant you, for the love of Beatrice. D. Pedro. And hath challenged thee? D. Pedro. What a pretty thing man is, when he goes in his doublet and hose, and leaves off his wit! Claud. He is then a giant to an ape; but then is an ape a doctor to such a man. D. Pedro. But, soft you; let me be: pluck up, my heart, and be sad. Did he not say, my brother was fled? Enter DOGBERRY, VERGES, and the Watch, with Dogb. Come, you, sir: if justice cannot tame you, she shall ne'er weigh more reasons in her balance. Nay, an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must be looked to. D. Pedro. How now! two of my brother's men bound? Borachio, one? Claud. Hearken after their offence, my lord. D. Pedro. Officers, what offence have these men done? Dogb. Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves. D. Pedro. First, I ask thee what they have done? thirdly, I ask thee, what's their offence? sixth and lastly, why they are committed? and, to conclude, what you lay to their charge? Claud. Rightly reasoned, and in his own division; and, by my troth, there's one meaning well suited. D. Pedro. Whom have you offended, masters, that you are thus bound to your answer? this learned constable is too cunning to be understood. What's your offence? Bora. Sweet prince, let me go no farther to mine answer: do you hear me, and let this count kill me. I have deceived even your very eyes: what your wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools have brought to light; who, in the night, overheard me confessing to this man, how Don John your brother, incensed me to slander the lady Hero; how you were brought into the orchard, and saw me court Margaret in Hero's garments; how you disgraced her, when you should marry her. My villainy they have upon record, which I had rather seal with my death, than repeat over to my shame. The lady is dead upon mine and my master's false accusation; and, briefly, I desire nothing but the reward of a villain. D. Pedro. Runs not this speech like iron through your blood? Claud. I have drunk poison whiles he utter'd it. D. Pedro. But did my brother set thee on to this? Bora. Yea; and paid me richly for the practice of it. D. Pedro. He is compos'd and fram'd of treachery.— And fled he is upon this villainy. Claud. Sweet Hero! now thine image doth appear In the rare semblance that I loved it first. Dogb. Come; bring away the plaintiffs: by this time our sexton hath reformed signior Leonato of the matter. And masters, do not forget to specify, when time and place shall serve, that I am an ass. Verg. Here, here comes master signior Leonato, and the sexton too. Re-enter LEONATO, ANTONIO, and the Sexton. Leon. Which is the villain? Let me see his eyes, That when I note another man like him, I may avoid him. Which of these is he? Bora. If you would know your wronger, look on me. 1 "Large belts were worn with the girdle before, but for wrestling, the buckle was turned behind, to give the adversary a fairer grasp at the girdle. The action was therefore a challenge."—Holt White. 2 a capon in f. e. 3 An allusion to a popular belief that a woodcock had no brains. 4 God-with a period at the end of the speech: in f. e. Leon. Art thou the slave, that with thy breath hast | be wished, God prohibit it.-Come, neighbour. kill'd Leon. No, not so, villain; thou beliest thyself: Here stand a pair of honourable men, A third is fled, that had a hand in it.— 'T was bravely done, if you bethink you of it. And yet, to satisfy this good old man, I would bend under any heavy weight That he 'll enjoin me to. Leon. I cannot bid you cause1 my daughter live; That were impossible; but, I pray you both, Possess the people in Messina, here, How innocent she died: and, if your love And sing it to her bones: sing it to-night. Be yet my nephew. My brother hath a daughter, Give her the right you should have given her cousin, Claud. O noble sir! Your over-kindness doth wring tears from me. I do embrace your offer, and dispose For henceforth of poor Claudio. Leon. To-morrow, then, I will expect your coming: To-night I take my leave.-This naughty man Shall face to face be brought to Margaret, Who, I believe, was pact2 in all this wrong, Hir'd to it by your brother. Bora. No, by my soul, she was not; Nor knew not what she did, when she spoke to me; But always hath been just and virtuous, In any thing that I do know by her. Dogb. Moreover, sir, which, indeed, is not under white and black, this plaintiff here, the offender, did call me ass: I beseech you, let it be remembered in his punishment. And also, the watch heard them talk of one Deformed: they say, he wears a key in his ear, and a lock hanging by it, and borrows money in God's name; the which he hath used so long, and never paid, that now men grow hard-hearted, and will lend nothing for God's sake. Pray you, examine him upon that point. Leon. I thank thee for thy care and honest pains. Dogb. Your worship speaks like a most thankful and reverend youth, and I praise God for you. Leon. There's for thy pains. Leon. Go: I discharge thee of thy prisoner, and I thank thee. [Exeunt DOGBERRY, VERGES, and Watch. Leon. Until to-morrow morning, lords, farewell. Ant. Farewell, my lords: we look for you to-mor How her acquaintance grew with this lewd3 fellow. [Exeunt. SCENE II-LEONATO's Garden. Enter BENEDICK and MARGARET, meeting. Bene. Pray thee, sweet mistress Margaret, deserve well at my hands by helping me to the speech of Beatrice. Marg. Will you, then, write me a sonnet in praise of my beauty? Bene. In so high a style, Margaret, that no man living shall come over it; for, in most comely truth, thou deservest it. Marg. To have no man come over me? why shall I always keep below stairs? Bene. Thy wit is as quick as the greyhound's mouth; it catches. Marg. And your 's as blunt as the fencer's foils, which hit, but hurt not. Bene. A most manly wit, Margaret; it will not hurt a woman: and so, I pray thee, call Beatrice. I give thee the bucklers. Marg. Give us the swords, we have bucklers of our own. Bene. If you use them, Margaret, you must put in the pikes with a vice; and they are dangerous weapons for maids. Marg. Well, I will call Beatrice to you, who, I think, hath legs. [Exit MARGARET. I Bene. And therefore will come. The god of love, That sits above, And knows me, and knows me, How pitiful I deserve, 4 [Singing.] mean, in singing; but in loving, Leander the good swimmer, Troilus the first employer of panders, and a whole book full of these quondam carpet-mongers, whose names yet run smoothly in the even road of a blank verse, why, they were never so truly turned over and over, as my poor self, in love. Marry, I cannot show it in rhyme; I have tried: I can find out no rhyme to "lady" but "baby,” an innocent rhyme; for "scorn," "horn," a hard rhyme; for "school," " fool," a babbling rhyme-very ominous endings. No, I was not born under a rhyming planet, nor I cannot woo in festival terms. Sweet Beatrice, wouldst thou come when I called thee? Beat. Yea, signior; and depart when you bid me. Bene. O stay but till then. Beat. "Then" is spoken; fare you well now:---and yet, ere I go, let me go with that I came for; which is, with knowing what hath passed between you and Claudio. Dogb. I leave an arrant knave with your worship; which, I beseech your worship, to correct yourself for Bene. Only foul words; and thereupon I will kiss thee. the example of others. God keep your worship; I wish Beat. Foul words is but foul wind, and foul wind is your worship well: God restore you to health. I humbly but foul breath, and foul breath is noisome; therefore give you leave to depart, and if a merry meeting may I will depart unkissed. 1 bid in f. e. : 2 Knight adheres to the old reading pack'd, an old form of the word in the text. song by William Elderton. 3 Wicked. • The beginning of a Bene. Thou hast frighted the word out of his right sense, so forcible is thy wit. But, I must tell thee plainly, Claudio undergoes my challenge, and either I must shortly hear from him, or I will subscribe him a coward. And, I pray thee now, tell me, for which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me? Beat. For them all together; which maintained so politic a state of evil, that they will not admit any good part to intermingle with them. But for which of my good parts did you first suffer love for me? Bene. Suffer love! a good epithet. I do suffer love, indeed, for I love thee against my will. Beat. In spite of your heart, I think. Alas, poor heart! If you spite it for my sake, I will spite it for yours; for I will never love that which my friend hates. Bene. Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably. Beat. It appears not in this confession: there's not one wise man among twenty that will praise himself. Bene. An old, an old instance, Beatrice, that lived in the time of good neighbours. If a man do not erect, in this age, his own tomb ere he dies, he shall live no longer in monument, than the bell rings, and the widow weeps. Beat. And how long is that, think you? Bene. Question:--why an hour in clamour, and a quarter in rheum: therefore is it most expedient for the wise, (if Don Worm, his conscience, find no impediment to the contrary,) to be the trumpet of his own virtues, as I am to myself. So much for praising myself, who, I myself will bear witness, is praiseworthy. And now tell me, how doth your cousin? Beat. Very ill. Bene. And how do you? Beat. Very ill too. The wolves have prey'd ; and look, the gentle day, Before the wheels of Phoebus, round about Dapples the drowsy east with spots of grey. Thanks to you all, and leave us : fare you well. Claud. Good morrow, masters: each his way can tell.* [Exeunt Torch-bearers." D. Pedro. Come, let us hence, and put on other weed; And then to Leonato's we will go. Claud. And Hymen now with luckier issue speed, Than this, for whom we render'd up this woe! [Exeunt. SCENE IV.A Room in LEONATO's House. Friar. Did I not tell you she was innocent? Upon the error that you heard debated: Ant. Well, I am glad that all things sort so well. Bene. Serve God, love me, and mend. There will To call young Claudio to a reckoning for it. Enter URSULA. Urs. Madam, you must come to your uncle. Yonder's old1 coil at home: it is proved, my lady Hero hath been falsely accused, the prince and Claudio mightily abused; and Don John is the author of all, who is fled and gone. Will you come presently? Beat. Will you go hear this news, signior? Bene. I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes; and, moreover, I will go with thee to thy uncle's. [Exeunt. SCENE III.The Inside of a Church. Enter Don PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and Attendants, with music and tapers. Claud. Is this the monument of Leonato? Leon. Well, daughter, and you gentlewomen all, [Exeunt Ladies. Ant. Which I will do with confirm'd countenance. Bene. To bind me, or undo me; one of them.— Leon. That eye my daughter lent her: 't is most true. But, for my will, my will is, your good will In which, good friar, I shall desire your help. And my help. Here come the prince, and Claudio. 1 Used in the colloquial emphatic sense, for "great." 2 knight: in f. e. 3 Done away with. 4 each his several way: in f. e. 5 Not in f. e. This line is from the quarto. |